Just The Way We Are

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The Real You

 by Danielle A. Durkin Body issues are as common as bodies. Many of us are at war with our bodies in different ways, most notably weight. We hate our body hair or belly fat or mole or height or whatever, yet we get up in the morning and do our jobs, raise families, participate in […]

12767194_10207398987905787_508799242_n

The Real You

 by Danielle A. Durkin Body issues are as common as bodies. Many of us are at war with our bodies in different ways, most notably weight. We hate our body hair or belly fat or mole or height or whatever, yet we get up in the morning and do our jobs, raise families, participate in […]

12767194_10207398987905787_508799242_n

The Real You

 by Danielle A. Durkin Body issues are as common as bodies. Many of us are at war with our bodies in different ways, most notably weight. We hate our body hair or belly fat or mole or height or whatever, yet we get up in the morning and do our jobs, raise families, participate in […]

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12767194_10207398987905787_508799242_n

The Real You

 by Danielle A. Durkin Body issues are as common as bodies. Many of us are at war with our bodies in different ways, most notably weight. We hate our body hair or belly fat or mole or height or whatever, yet we get up in the morning and do our jobs, raise families, participate in life. But then you get a mysterious illness and gain weight no matter how many mornings a week you exercise before work. Your oval face gets round and puffy. Long purple lines appear on your legs. Pain is everywhere. You forget things and can’t keep track of your own phone number. Your hands shake so much you can’t hold a pen and you wonder if the students in your writing class where you have to orchestrate discussion and collect papers will notice that you’ve … [Read More...]

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Showgirl Style Documentary Film

For any woman who has ever felt nervous about strutting her stuff and feeling good about her body...Heidi Moore of Wretched Productions  just released a documentary of a three-day retreat in September where Anni Boelyn of the Kountry Kittens hosted a women's retreat Showgirl Style in the small Sierra Nevada town of Twain Harte. The film features B. Sinclair and Miss Savvy as well as the Kountry Kittens uplifting the women of the retreat and giving them a whole new outlook on life. Everyone had body issues to get over in one way or another... here it is:   … [Read More...]

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Welcome to GBP

  Girl. Because no matter what decade we find ourselves in, we share a desire to heal a piece of ourselves while doing everything within our power to make sure today’s daughters grow strong in mind before all else. Body. We are at war with the reflection we see in the mirror. It’s either too full or too thin or too curvy or not curvy enough. We want more for our daughters. We also want to be able to check out at the grocery store without being bombarded by magazine headlines touting The Best Diet, How to Get a Better Body Faster, and the Six-Week-Post-Partum-Bikini-Photo-Shoot that is now par for the course for practically every celeb mom. This constant reminder that we can’t possibly be happy as we are is what we (and … [Read More...]

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GBP Reboot: The Plate

Do we talk about depression here? Well, I’m gonna, anyway. In a post with too much capitalization, so please bear with me. I’m that woman who Has Too Much On My Plate, and is Too Hard On Myself. I’ve heard those two titles for me so many times that I feel like I should put them on my business card. My overbearing need to Get Things Done was fine before I had children. I had only myself, my career, my home, and then my husband…okay and then our dog and cat…to manage. But then came our kids. And then came me losing my shit. Or so it seems inside my head. I don’t think anyone besides my therapist and my dog and cat, who had to be “re-homed,” knew the truth. I’m not sure where I started to take on too much or when it started to … [Read More...]

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Why I’m Proud of My Ass

by Claudya Martinez Today, I stood there under the hot sun soaking in some vitamin D for a minute or two and I was actually proud of my ass. I’m proud of my ass, gente. I’m not being metaphorical here, I mean I was genuinely proud of my butt. This matters why? Not because I have a perfectly toned worked-out posterior, because I don’t. Not because it’s small, because it’s not. Not because it looks like JLo’s or Beyonce’s, because it doesn’t. I was proud of my ass because it’s mine and even though it’s bigger than it used to be, even though it’s not as tight as it used to be, it’s the only ass I have and why shouldn’t I be proud of it? We all have body issues and I have a ton of them. I miss what I used to look like and it pisses me … [Read More...]

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Reach for the Surface: A Post about Depression

    Let me tell you about depression. It's not all-encompassing. But it is. It doesn't define us. But it changes our definition of self. There's no shame in depression. It's true and we believe it when we reach out to our loved ones & friends who are fighting their own battles. But there is shame when we are the ones wondering why the sun isn't as bright anymore. Why it takes so much energy to get out of bed. We know logically that we shouldn't feel like this. But we do. And I think we need to talk about that more. Because what we know to be true when we are not depressed isn't the same truth we know when we are. We need to acknowledge that Depression can laugh. Depression can be funny. Depression … [Read More...]

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Click-Bait and Celeb Bashing

Let's make one thing clear before we get started, shall we? Click-bait pisses me off. You know what I mean. Those "articles" that are really just slideshows with an ad thrown in every other slide? The ones that usually have really saucy headlines like "Hot Movie Stars and their Horrifically Ugly Partners?" Yeah, those. I'm going to ignore the fact that most of these clickbait bits are usually just a great way to hide the fact that the writer can't actually string an entire article together in one singular and fluid piece and focus instead on the level of passive aggressive bullshit contained in little gems. Take, for example, this one. The title is "These 15 Fat Celebs Need to Get Healthy Again". Of course, health is mistakingly … [Read More...]

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ChiChis to the Max

As a mother of a young girl, I consider myself pretty well-versed on what to expect in the Milestones category. I mean, I used to be one myself, so Hands in the Air for Team Life Experience!!! I've smiled and laughed and cried my way through every stage so far, starting with the day my Not-So-Little Anymore Girl learned to roll over (that was the end of total control in motherhood and a hard pill to swallow). I dutifully bit my tongue and kept offering each new food as she learned to exercise her newfound mobility and hand-eye coordination by insisting she hated every food she once loved (or at least tolerated before she figured out how to pick things up with her tiny fists and throw it all as far as she possibly could because No, Mama! … [Read More...]

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When the Holidays Aren’t So Merry

  Text from my mother: I just wish I had one more hug and a chance to talk to your father so I could let him go and move on with my life. You know how hard this time of year is. Yes. I do. He died in November 27, 2008. Eliana was 6 months old. I was 6 weeks shy of my 30th birthday. It was my mother's 49th birthday and that year, the day before Thanksgiving. He was only 50 years old. My parents had just celebrated 30 years of marriage that September. It's hard to give thanks, sometimes, when the day is wrapped in memories of loss. For my mom, it's doubly so. Every year is a reminder of the day she lost her husband. Every year I remember how her legs buckled and I caught her before she hit the ground when the monitors flatlined, … [Read More...]

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Mothering a Body Positive Child

  I honestly should have expected the question. I think, though, I knew...but the six years between writing and publishing BabyFat, I kind of just, well? I forgot. BabyFat: Adventures in Motherhood, Muffin Tops, & Trying to Stay Sane is a book for any woman who's ever dealt with body image issues. It's tone is my voice - snarky, honest, funny, and sometimes not. The nuances are there and will be picked up by most adults (and most assuredly by my intended audience), but not so much with a child. So when she asked me why I was being mean to myself by calling myself fat in the book title, she stopped me in my tracks. I had to think because the answer mattered. A lot. I wanted to turn tail and avoid it entirely, but I knew I … [Read More...]

Photo credit: Pauline M. Campos

Owning My Reflection (Again)

This post originally appeared on Aspiring Mama in January of 2013. Funny how some things change and others remain the same. I don't promise to be perfect. I don't pretend to be anything other than flawed - a continual work in progress. Today wasn't so great. Tomorrow, I get to try again when the sun wakes up.   See this? See my reflection full of curves and soft places that serve to comfort my child and turn on my husband even when I can’t see past the cellulite and society’s ideals? Good. Know that I feel good when I focus on nothing but that: how I feel. Fuck the scale. Screw the BMI. And to hell with what anyone else thinks. If I feel good, I also feel worth my own efforts to treat myself right, eat right … [Read More...]